On the Plate

There are several things that have been piling up at Apple Traffic Control. It’s been well documented that Apple hasn’t released a significant product upgrade in a year. Christmas is also on the radar, and the consumer product line needs to be in shape by late November. We may have a two-event quarter ahead.

Here’s what we know is coming in the next three months: From traditional Apple release schedules, an iPod refresh, an iPhone refresh and an iPad refresh. From previous announcements, iOS 7 and Mac OS X Mavericks are due. Also, the iMac and the MacBook Pro are expected to get the months-old Haswell processor upgrades, not to mention the Mac mini.

Essentially, the only products not in the upgrade cycle are iCloud, MacBook Air and Mac Pro. The Mac Pro still needs a release date, too.

Assuming Apple decides to stick to an iPhone theme, as I believe they will, the iPhone 5 will be upgraded, iOS will get a release date (Sept. 12, iPhone only), the Apple TV gets a software upgrade and a new low-cost iPhone model will be introduced. The announcement of a low-cost iPhone will suck the air out of anything else Apple might mention and it wouldn’t be a good idea to include much else in the event.

The Mac Pro will be released in an event on October 29th alongside OS X Mavericks, the next-gen iPad and iPad mini.

What Not To Wear

No wearable computing will be released at this event. The “iWatch” may be a product under development, but the hires Apple has made and the usual development time for the company would make a release this soon extremely unlikely. Expect the Wall Street Journal, CNBC commentators and other high-paid but minimally-informed folks to make comments about Apple’s lack of innovation.

Apple TV

I don’t expect a fabled actual “TV set” to be released, but I do expect a major upgrade the the existing TV service. There are reports that a new “Set Top Box” Apple shipment has been made from China, and if true, I expect it’s because Apple wants an ample supply of the existing Apple TV ready for a rush of purchases. I believe we will see a major headline-making content announcement and/or an iOS 7 software refresh.

iPhone

As must be known in the outer reaches of the solar system by now, the iPhone 5 will be upgraded with a new fingerprint-reading home button to act as a passcode substitute for extra security against theft. Also, the phone will have a 12-megapixel camera with the clearest low-light photography available in a consumer handset.

It will remain at the “tall” screen size and resolution, but with improved brightness of the display. Battery life will be improved to 10 hours or more. The case will be minimally thinner and I don’t think a gold phone is in the cards. The iPhone will also have upgraded LTE.

I do not believe an iPhone-as-payment system is ready, and it will not be part of the announcement.

Price: status quo.

Name: iPhone 5s.

iPhone LC

I’ve been predicting a low-cost iPhone for the last two years, and I may finally have my day. Since a stopped clock is right twice a day, I’m glad this seems to be happening before four o’clock.

Despite my earlier statements that a low-cost iPhone would be a big-screen iPhone, I’m prepared to be wrong on that. If the leaks are anywhere near correct, there’s no sign of a big-screen iPhone anywhere.

The low-cost iPhone appears to be plastic-cased and available in multiple colors. If you want to know which ones, just look at the iOS 7 home screen.

Price: the base unit will be 399 off-contract, free on-contract.

I also believe the iPhone 5 will be completely discontinued or kept on in foreign markets and the iPhone LC will take over both the “free” and “$99” slots in the US Apple pricing structure. Why? The LC will have near equal specs or better specs than the 5 in some areas, and dropping the 5 to free might be taking too big a chunk of the margins. Putting it at $99 may be asking too much for what would essentially be the free phone with an aluminum case.

Name: iPhone 5c? If it happens, so be it. The appended naming convention makes me feel the ghost of Spindler. I’d prefer something like “iPhone bright” or “iPhone spectrum” or something like that.

iOS 7

We already know the what the guts of iOS 7 are, but will there be anything new? The iLife suite will be upgraded, if just on a cosmetic level. Usually, Apple drops a new home screen app alongside a new phone. I believe that the iLife apps be either free downloads or made a part of iOS.

Anything else?

Kinda of a yawner product intro, if you ask me. It’s just a couple of hours before the event, but there’s a lack of buzz with all the leaks we’ve seen. The only thing that will make me really get excited is something no one has yet predicted.

I have an extensive iTunes Library, with about 23,000 music tracks. I’ve been buying CDs since the mid-80’s, have digitized all 3000 of them and I’m now digitizing my 500 vinyl records and 100 cassettes. In addition to that, I’ve purchased 2600 tracks from the iTunes Store.

So, as you might guess, managing that library has become mighty important to me. My smart playlist system is crazy sophisticated. When iCloud and iTunes Match came about, I was the first in line for it. Overall, I’ve been satisfied with the service, but the one thing that’s consistently puzzled me was seeing the smart playlists I made on my computer going totally out of whack when I got them on my devices.

What what happening to my precious, precious playlists? First, iCloud playlists can’t reference other playlists. That accounted for many of my issues, but there were still playlists that didn’t work right. Well, after a bit of testing, I figured it out – iCloud doesn’t use all the fields available in the iTunes desktop app. Also, some fields are inconsistent and buggy. So here’s a list of what iTunes fields are “seen” by iCloud. If you want your smart playlists to transfer to iCloud, only use these fields:

Album
Album Artist
Album Rating
Album Artist
Bit Rate
Comments
Compilation
Composer
Date Added
Disc Number
Genre
Grouping
Name
Purchased
Sort Album
Sort Album Artist
Sort Artist
Sort Composer
Sort Name
Time
Track Number
Year

Here are the fields iCloud can’t see:

BPM
Category
Checked
Date Modified
Description
Kind
Last Played
Last Skipped
Location
Plays
Sample Rate
Season
Show
Sort Show

Here are the fields that don’t apply to iCloud, and can’t be used:

Artwork – The desktop app uses this a a boolean art/no art, but iCloud can’t
iCloud Status – Since you’re on iCloiud, it doesn’t apply
Media Kind – Analytical, not actually data
Playlist – Playlists referencing other playlists don’t transfer

These fields are inconsistent, and appear to be either buggy or not fully implemented:

Rating – Inconsistently transfers
Size – This result seems to vary
Skips – The count doesn’t reflect actual skip data

Cue the usual happy good-looking folks enjoying Apple products, and then, begin the narration:

This is it.
This is what matters.
The experience of a product.
How it makes someone feel.
When you start by imagining
What that might be like,
You step back,
You think.

Who will it help?
Will it make life better?
Does it deserve to exist?
If you are making everything,
How can you perfect anything?

We don’t believe in coincidence,
Or dumb luck.
There are a thousand “no’s”
For every “yes.”
We spend a lot of time
On a few great things.
Until every idea we touch
Enhances each life it touches.

You may rarely look at it,
But you’ll always feel it.
This is our signature.
And it means everything.

Designed by Apple in California

This ad is done with all the tact and thought behind a “Cash for Gold” commercial. I’m depressed a little more very time I see it.

Why? Because it is Apple leading you by the nose to how they want to be perceived. The “Think Different” commercials talked about creativity and celebrated it, only referencing Apple by association, and setting new expectations.

This new ad talks about Apple, Apple and more Apple. No big ideas, no celebration. It’s just about the incorporated business entity doing some navel-gazing.

That narration is awful, too. You can hear the director saying “one more time, but try to emote more.”

I was sitting in a Taco Bell recently, shoving a cheap lunch down my gullet, when I noticed the artwork that hung on the wall. It wasn’t bad. Someone, somewhere inside that corporation wanted their customers to have something to look at that was pleasant. But rather than just put up some art that made eating yellow lettuce more palatable, they made sure the artwork was made of Taco Bell logos, ingredients and product names.

They wanted me to regard Taco Bell as a nice place, but couldn’t waste a moment to push their corporate goals into my face.

That’s what this ad campaign feels like to me. This isn’t a new manifesto, this is a set of corporate talking points laden with focus-group tested language. Apple wants to make sure people know they’re a good bunch, but can’t resist making it a powerpoint preso.

This is it.
This is what matters.
The experience of a product.

What is “it?” What is “this?” The very first line assumes that you’re looking at picture. It’s declaring that this is an ad. Watching this on TV, my honed anti-ad defense system has just kicked in.

The “experience of a product.” Why use the word “product?” It’s sterile and corporate. You might as just as well say “units.” Why does a person at home give a flying fuck about “products?” Do they write “product” down on their shopping lists? Do kids write Santa Claus for a shiny new “product” under the tree?

How it makes someone feel.

Feel? How it makes me feel? This is something a therapist says in hushed tones to keep from offending you. It’s hard to use a word that is more neutered than “feel.” The words in this ad are too safe and too bland.

When you start by imagining
What that might be like,

Imagining. Another neutered word that comes out of the marketing dictionary. People react with a 76% positive Q score to the word Imagine! Let’s use that word!

You step back,
You think.

Step back from what? Imagining my experiences for the feelings I have for units?

Who will it help?
Will it make life better?
Does it deserve to exist?

Nothing about the process of creating? Apparently, Apple has a fully-formed product that they found on their doorstep and now it rests before the mighty executives to decide if it lives or dies. The product wasn’t shaped by what they wanted to do with it as they built it – it just showed up, complete, ready for divine judgement on it’s very existence.

If you are making everything,
How can you perfect anything?

This isn’t a philosophy so much as a direct shot at Samsung. At the very least, a shot at “competitors.” Why would a consumer care at all what you think about your competition? That’s your problem, not theirs. Make the best product you can, put out there, and hope it flies out of the nest. Don’t talk smack about others. Contrasting your “philosophy” against your competition is just another way of talking about how great you are. It’s a boast.

We don’t believe in coincidence,
Or dumb luck.

If I wrote this in a school essay, I’d get docked 10 points for using cliches.

There are a thousand “no’s”
For every “yes.”

So Apple makes 1,000 products that never make it out of R&D for every one they do release? This is overstating your case, and overstating it for a melodramatic effect. Cheap sentiment.

We spend a lot of time
On a few great things.

This is the first part of this ad I actually agree with…

Until every idea we touch
Enhances each life it touches.

…and then they blew it. “Touch” and “Enhance” are two more five-star focus group words. “Idea” is a three-star. A reader or listener to this won’t even remember these words. They’re weightless and waft away like dust in a sunbeam, ready to collect under the rug and give you allergies later. The worst part of this phrase is that it just sounds so shamelessly corporate. I wonder if the first draft didn’t have “synergy” in it.

You may rarely look at it,
But you’ll always feel it.

Are you feeling it? Are you feeling it now?

This is our signature.
And it means everything.

“Everything.” Another wispy, wimpy word that generalizes. So I sat through the whole ad to end on that? Be specific. If you want to convince me, you need to tell me what it means to you.

Designed by Apple in California

“We’re not evil.” Was that the whole point of this? To just defend yourselves and end with “Made in the USA?”

This ad campaign is just that – an ad campaign. It’s a carefully phrased, non-threatening, vague word salad designed to plug holes in their public profile. It reads like ad copy and has no ambition to raise the discussion or change the focus. It just tries to slap band-aids on Apple’s current problems.

If you’re going to blow a few million trying to reset expectations, you don’t aim low, you aim high and you use words and ideas people will actually remember. Yes, it’s hard to do, but if it was easy, you wouldn’t get restricted stock units.

Worst of all, Apple isn’t content to let the products do the talking for them anymore. As they say in sports, “winning fixes everything.” Apple needs to win with their products, not with their words. Not with ads. Not with shallow ad copy. Not with “statement” ads. Those are for BP and AIG.

Don’t trade on your reputation. Keep making your reputation better.

Focus. Make great stuff. Ship.

Be Apple.

The bloody, messy aftermath of a bad prediction list. Sigh. Here we go.

iOS Devices

No Announcements: Correct

Mac Portables

MacBook Pro refresh: Wrong.

MacBook Air refresh: Correct.

Air CPU GHz prediction: So wrong.

Dropping the 15-inch MacBook Pro Non-Retina: Wrong. I still think this may happen, whenever they refresh the MacBook Pro line.

Mac Desktops

Mac Pro Announcement: Correct.

New design: Correct:

Everything else about it: Wrong. Not a rack-mountable unit, and not a hot-swappable unit.

Mac OS

Better iCloud support, cloud backup, Siri, notifications improvements: Wrong, wrong, wrong. But notifications did get an upgrade. Correct.

Features announced in Mac OS and iOS simultaneously. Technically correct, but on minor features. I was expecting something bigger.

New naming convention: Correct, although I thought they’d stick with animals.

iOS

iCloud as the biggest deal: Wrong. iCloud’s biggest thing was the iWork on iCloud demo, which was the least interesting announcement.

Fix for Core Data: Correct. At least, they’re doing something new with Core Data. Can’t say anything without tripping over an NDA.

iBooks in the cloud: Wrong.

iRadio: Correct (although everyone already knew).

iMovie and iPhoto upgrades: Wrong, so far. These will probably be updated in October when the iOS hardware ships.

AirDrop as transfer for iOS: Correct.

System Preferences revamp: Correct.

That iOS was going to get the “Braun” treatment: A matter of opinion. I think it did get a minimalist Braun-like design, but it wasn’t quite what I was seeing in my mind. I was thinking more metal than frosted glass.

Messages: No announcements, but probably wrong.

That was a tough go for my prediction skills. I’ll be licking my wounds for a while. It’s okay – my saliva is internationally recognized by the WHO for it’s healing properties.

No question we’ve just got a brand new and exciting look for iOS 7. The flat design and frosted transparency look will take some getting used to, but it’s definitely an improvement over the current candy-button and shadowy look.

However.

Those icons. Those home screen icons. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say these were designed in a rush. They look like they were supposed to get a few more revisions and a few more coats of varnish before they were used. The icons just don’t have the refinement and craft that I’m used to in an Apple product.

So, rather than just whine, I spent the 7 hours after the WWDC keynote working on it. I try not to complain unless I have a fix in mind, so here’s what my home screen of iOS 7 would look like:

For seven hours work, I think that’s a big improvement. Yes, there are gradients all over the place, but that’s something we’ll have to live with unless we want a lawsuit from Microsoft.

For comparison:

Messages: The message bubble is too large and the “tail” too small in the original. This tries to fix that imbalance.

Calendar: No changes. Looks great.

Photos: No changes. I have no idea how that icon directly relates to photography, but I’m good with it.

Camera: New icon. The official icon looks small and underwhelming, and for some oddball reason, has a relief effect to it, giving it depth – unlike all the other new icons. Mine reverses the grey/black colors, and adds some color to the lens. It better resembles not only the actual lens on the back of the device, but is more visually engaging.

Weather: No changes. I like the abstract weather look.

Clock. No changes, but why is it suddenly 9:41? Is it actually showing the proper time? It appears so, if the status bar is any indication.

Maps: Absolutely terrible icon. The insider element of this is that the old icon was actually Apple’s HQ, and this location is where Campus 2 will go, but the blockiness and fine-line detail sabotage the new look. It’s a bad rendition, and Campus 2 is still three years away, for goodness sakes. I’ve re-created the 1 Infinite Loop map, and with the abstract look of the rest of the icons.

Videos: Why so much blank space? It feels like something’s missing. To fill the space, I’ve put a “play” triangle in there.

Notes: Another blank space. With white and yellow, can an icon be more bland? I put in some lines and color to try and add some visual information and distinguish itself from the next icon, which looks almost exactly the same. I don’t care if the actual app does’t look like this, the icon is supposed to suggest what it is, dagnabbit.

Reminders: When I sassed if an icon could be more bland, this one gives Notes a run for the money. Four small colored dots and thin grey lines. Wow. So I did my best, by enlarging the dots and giving the eye something to look at.

Stocks: No changes. It’s not a great icon, but it’s functional enough.

Game Center: I love the idea, the execution sucks. Why is it all aqua-like all of the sudden? That candy look was supposed to be gone, but here it is again. Why? So here, I’ve abstracted the balls and applied the same transparency effects.

Newsstand: I love the little designs for the icons in this one, but, again, they betray the new abstract iconography. So, once more, I’ve abstracted a news rack to suggest what the function is while keeping things looking simple.

iTunes Store & App Store: The giant white circle ruins it. It takes up too much space and adds too much white. I’ve removed the circe, and replaced it with a second gradient, allowing the white icon to be larger and take up more space, and adding visual complexity.

Passbook: No changes. It’s nice. The icons may be a smidge too tiny.

Compass: One of the challenges of designing an iOS home page is that you have two icons that are compasses (Compass, Safari). However, in an effort to stick to a “circle” theme, (Clock, iTune Store, App Store, Settings and Safari) Compass beefs it. First: Why is the dial rotated 45 degrees, to have north pointing northeast? If it’s rotated, why are the letters still facing “up?” Even if that is a feature of the new Compass app, why display it here, in this way, totally confusing everyone? Second: Why is the pointer in the upper right, and so small that you don’t even recognize it at at directional pointer? Sheesh! So, I dump the circle theme, point it up and make the pointer bigger.

Settings: What kind of gear is this supposed to be? A Ten-Speed spoke? Seriously? Simplify. So I just have a nice big gear that’s clear and obvious.

Phone: No changes.

Mail: No changes.

Safari: The circle theme continues as does the “dial” theme (Clock, Compass, Safari.) The white border sucks the life out of the icon, so I put in a matching blue gradient. The tick-marks are just ugly, so they’re gone. I put the “globe” effect back in from older Safari icons, because I do think that the globe is the best visual metaphor for web surfing. “Dial” does not say web surfing.

Music: I change the gradient here a little, just because I think the original doesn’t match the new color scheme. This tones it down slightly, too.

Original artwork © Apple